Week 1: Arriving into Herrnhut

R. Sandoval

Week 1: Arriving into Herrnhut

Midnight invited me into a sleepless night. Through the window, a full moon swayed brightly in the middle of the sky. I couldn´t help but to get lost in its consuming light in awe as I thought about those who looked up at the same moon without thinking about you, God. 

Before the candle melted to darkness, I questioned, why? Why stand still and repeat words of an inherited faith? Why leave the bible open in the same page gathering dust? Why false words and testimonies? Why dance in the dark but hide in the light? Why go so many years looking at this harvest moon and not reaping the ripe harvest? Why let life go by taking for granted the full moon instead of listening to its soft whisper reflecting the glory of God? 

I hadn´t realized by then that Revolution by the Beatles played in the background saying, You say you want a Revolution, well you know, we all want to change the world. And sitting there, bathed in the light of the same moon, God spoke clearly to my heart. 

Well, you say you want a Revolution, so why are you not doing anything about it? Why are you not being obedient? 

Scripture came to mind, “But you are a chosen race, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for his own possession, that you may proclaim the excellencies of him who called you out of darkness into his marvelous light” (I Peter 2:12). 

If God was going to use me on something, it had to be something I was passionate about. But possibilities seemed invisible and far, this is why encountering a Photography DTS seemed to a perfect casualty. Testified how Jesus guided me through this new phase of preparation.

I knew this was no casualty, it was God´s perfect plan. My dreams were no longer dreams, but now it was a possibility. And more exciting, a possibility that could turn into an instrument to reach the nations, a subject I had been learning about in the past year. 

So I got on a plane and flew towards the moon, to find myself seeing something like rain falling from the sky. Thicker. Whiter. A dreamier sight than the normal horizon in the tropic my eyes were used to. The air against my skin felt foreign but strangely real. Yes, it was no longer my imagination.

That sleepless night seemed so far now, as I immersed myself into a new world of snow. The unknown German landscape made evident how far I was from home.

Trying to keep my eyelids open on the train caught the glimpse of the brown mountains slowly turn into white ones, making my way deeper and deeper into a small German town—the smallest, indeed—called Herrnhut.

The tripod case suddenly felt twice as heavy on my back. The fat luggage next to me whispered: You are on your own now. It is real. You can depend on no one but God. You did a 16 hour flight to get unattached from yourself and know God deeper. What are you doing? What brought you here?

As soon as my head hit the cold pillow of the bed that I would use for the next three months—it hit me. The window framed a perfect view of falling snow and grey skies. The trees, with its naked branches, got dressed up in sparkly white. Truly, God was real, and alive, showing me his greatness and calling for my love as I lied silently in the bunk bed.

I felt hugged and overwhelmed. It was as if he had said I wasn´t far, but mostly, I wasn´t lonely, because He was there with me, all the time. He hadn´t left one single second.

During the first week, God placed in my heart one word: service.  Serving a new body, a new community and being a true servant of this new family. I didn´t know where to look because it seemed like such a premature concept—given the situation—however, later I understood, as we prayed for each other, that God meant I had to serve my new sisters and brothers in the way of love, as in caring for their needs.

One day, I remember, as I fought with my eyelids in an act of consequence of several jet lagged sleep; that we were being taught about “Passion”. I took several notes:

Live. Compromise. Becoming Jesus. Burn. Everything. Will only get it through sacrifice. Suffering. Extreme. Radical. Brings change into the world. Being good because of passion. If there is no conflict, there is no passion risk.

I reviewed the phrases and words when the clock ticked it´s way to 11PM,. I felt fragile. I silently wished I could have that burning compromise in my heart, and prayed that God would place this zeal that he wanted me to have deep within my soul. I could almost feel the Holy Spirit stirring within me, calling and calling me, to search more, encounter, discover and know God in a whole new dimension that I had not yet unveiled.